Tuesday, May 14, 2013

In pieces

This morning I staggered into the bathroom and sat down... Then looked at my legs in horror.

I'm covered in dime sized bruises from my knee to my thigh. My sleep crusted eyes and foggy brain couldn't process what I was seeing, so I just stared.

After a few seconds I woke up enough to realize what it was that I was seeing.

During the show last week there were so many funny moments, and so many touching moments... that I would forget why I was there. I'd be lost in the story lines of the other actors within the first few seconds that they'd take the stage. I'd roar with laughter over and over no matter how many how many times I heard their parts... and I'd tear up, and openly weep during others. Then I'd spend the first 15 seconds I was on stage trying to remember who my character was... trying to regroup from what I'd just watched.

When we actually started the show for an audience I realized that I needed to keep myself in check. I couldn't sit and cry through the touching piece before I went on stage, I needed to isolate myself... my character from the other story lines so I could fully be my own character. I needed a distraction that would bring me back to my seat- out of the story being played out in front of me....

I took to jamming my thumbs into my thigh muscle.

I should likely come up with some other method for the future.

1 comment:

rae said...

you're the weirdest herb on the internet.