I was feeling pretty stressed by the time I left work tonight. Carrying too many thoughts and worries.
I did get the job.. so that's a huge amazing thing, but now until my old contract is filled, we're a little strapped for relief staff. Add the fact that another staff has moved and one full time staff is in the hospital and another is starting a vacation to Cuba... well.. I'm booked for 10 shifts in a row and it's looking like I could be asked to extend that and work my entire weekend off again.... making it a run of 13. I've done longer before, but I'm really trying to be aware of my emotional capacity for ...everything... it suffers when I don't have a day off.
So anyway... I was feeling worn. I nearly cried when I realized I might have to work Sunday in addition to Saturday. And my coworkers saw that, so I was feeling stupid for being so effected. Yes I'm excited about the full time contract but it took a lot out of me this past week wondering/waiting to hear. I didn't really have a back up plan.
But then... on my way home I remembered about a little group that was meeting at the firehall theatre... a little group of people getting together to sing. Taking time to work on audition pieces or songs from shows they might be in.
I turned my car around and went.
It was a small group. I'd missed the first half/warm-up. But there were hugs. And smiles. And encouraging words. And singing. Together.
And I found an audition piece.
And I still don't know if I can even be part of the next show with my work schedule, but I have people I can sing with, blend voices with, meet in that sacred space where sound comes out and blends and bends and is beautiful and is one.
So things are good.
My heart is full again.