Thursday, June 26, 2014

Thursday confessionals

I have fond memories of the candy we used to buy as kids.
I think that's a thing in every generation right?

One thing we used to buy when we'd go camping or to the cottage was that MacIntosh toffee caramel stuff. Like a thick strip of tooth breaking sugar wrapped in a plaid box- green and red. It had scores marked into it so you could presumably break of a chunk and enjoy it. I think our parents bought it because they knew we'd have to gnaw for hours on the thing in silence... in fear of ripping our teeth from our head.

I found some at the dollar store yesterday. I was so excited... I'd forgotten about the part where my teeth would become trapped in the effort to enjoy it. I got it home and bit in and.... got stuck for a few seconds.  So I tried to snap off a piece. And just bent it.

The grown-up brain parts in me kicked in... I grabbed the cutting board and knife that was sitting on the counter and chopped that sucker up into enjoyable bites... sure, it shattered and the pieces adhered to the cutting board, but who cares? I'd won.

I spent all day yesterday savouring little bites of the stuff, prying the pieces off the cutting board with my fingernail or the knife. SO GOOD!

Last night I absentmindedly picked the last of the flakes off the board and popped them in my mouth while I talked with a friend. The last piece didn't melt.

It just... sat in my mouth.

I tried bending it with my teeth, maybe it was just a little more dried out than the others?

Nope.

I spit out the offending piece into my hand... to discover it was in fact a dried out piece of raw chicken from the previous night when I'd used the cutting board....

I promise to wash all my dishes from now on and not leave them on the counter.

1 comment:

Nursedude said...

It's probably better from a mental health standpoint to think of it as chicken jerky rather than left over chicken.