pomegranates and butter tarts

pomegranates.
I was sure I was getting kicked out of the library today because of pomegranates.

This afternoon I worked a placement at the public library in Happytown. Hope Town. The P-dot. I'm supporting two individuals who want to learn how to use the library better, more independently. SO, I teach them how to use things there. Today, we spent about ten minutes just learning how to use, and then practicing, the bar code scanner for the library cards.... pretty funny stuff. I get my people set up online, and they are both working on emails to their sisters.
And then... along comes Babba.
Babba... aka Pader, aka... many other names.... is one of Happytown's most awesome characters. I'd love to write about him... but I'm afraid I wouldn't do him justice. He's lovely. And he's a little rough around the edges. And sometimes a little crude. Ok, sometimes really crude. But cares about people. And even though some of the most shocking things come out of his mouth- it is for shock, and sometimes to draw you away from the truth about something else he's touched on... but one of the nicest guys. He'll do anything.. for anyone.
Anyway. Babba finds me in the Library.
Babba- My Friend Marie! (he always calls me by my middle name) I have got something for you today, I brought it. I thought I would see you. You go for a smoke?
Me- Sorry Babba, I don't smoke. I try very hard not to smoke.
B- oh. oh. ok, we go to the stacks.
M- ?
B- here, here by the books, I want to film you.
M- um.. no. (laughing)
B- What? you scared?
M- Yes. I'm scared. it's my first time. (note: you can't help but be just as crude right back)
B- (laughing) I've got you a Pomegranates, like in my video, with my grandson, I teach you to eat it right. just a leetle bite, then you suck the juice and ... MAMA!
M- (still laughing) you have contraband items in the library Babba.
B- come here....

so now we're hiding in the video section. One of Babba's friends is giving him the stink eye, but laughing from across the room. Babba is trying to teach me how to squish the Pomegranate, and bite the tiniest hole in it... there's a pretty funny language barrier thing going on thru this whole section... and Babba seems to be worried I'm going to mess the library up... or my shirt... and tries to give me a map book to use as a bib. I manage to get the map book away from him.
But by this point, I'm nearly hyperventilating trying not to laugh loudly. Stink eye- from across the room is laughing pretty hard now. Babba doesn't even try to be quiet... the loud stage whisper he's using to speak to me with can be heard all the way to the front desk.

eventually, I find out it's got to be the most tiny hole, just nipped... and that I've got to be careful because it will explode.. but I can't seem to bite it because it's so soft, it's bending away from my teeth... I get this tiny spot ripped, but not all the way through.... and Babba starts squeezing the pom... it explodes. Thankfully, mostly into my mouth and not all over the carpet.

Babba giggles and runs off to charm the woman at the front desk.
Thankfully it works, and there's not even a hint of anger over the food, juice, noise.
sheesh.

M- you probably should have been filming that
B- I know. it was going to be a great movie.